Ah, romance!
Where would we be without it? Unfortunately, romance can easily be forgotten when careers, families and the necessities of daily life become our primary focus. But romance is important for every couple, whether you've been together for 30 days or 30 years. Making a little time for romance needs to get back on your priority list.
The good news is that there are lots of easy and inexpensive ways to get romantic without even leaving your house. It's all about getting a little creative.
Remember: Romance is Subjective
No matter what a bunch of so-called women's magazines tell you, not all people think the same things are romantic. Some women find the idea of a bubble bath with floating rose petals to be trite and cliche, while other women will swoon at the sight. Some women would rather eat a bucket of fried chicken than dine at a fancy French restaurant, while other women will say "ooh, la la" to the idea of a swanky night out. The point is, romance, much like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.
What does this mean for you? It means that romance is based on personal interests so if you want to plan a romantic evening at home, you need to think about what you and your partner enjoy and actually consider romantic.
Let's say you are both huge fans of sushi and old black-and-white movies. Perhaps your romantic evening entails some sushi take-out or delivery (perhaps removed from the plastic containers and re-plated), a few candles and some old romantic movies starring Humphrey Bogart or Cary Grant. Romance is in the details. The more you can take a generic idea like "dinner and a movie" and tailor it to your individual tastes - in this example sushi and Cary Grant_ the more romantic your night will be.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Napkin Placement Mystery Solved
Napkins placement can create internal battles within our heads and when you ask for other people's opinion then problems sometimes surface on a personal basis of who is correct. When setting the table, first of all relax, it really can be fun. Second, there are some simple etiquette "rules" to follow. (Etiquette, remember is a guide to help us along and to make our guests feel at ease.)
Don't you worry...I'm here to aid you in this decision.
I prefer to set the napkin in the center of the plate, with a nice napkin ring. Many people like to place the napkin in the water goblet, but after breaking a friend's Tiffany crystal stemware trying to remove it, I now try to spare guests of mine - and my fine crystal - the same fate.
After you remove your napkin from the ring, place the napkin on your lap and the ring to the left of your plate. After you have finished your meal and get up to leave the table, you can place the napkin to the left of your plate, or once your plate has been removed, you can place it where your plate had been, but not back in the napkin ring. However, it's proper etiquette to leave your napkin on your lap until you get up from the table...even if you're finished eating. If everyone stays at the table and chats after the meal, it is considered rude to have your dirty napkin in sight.
Don't have napkin rings on hand? Here's how to fold one like a pro:
Fold the napkin into a triangle. Fold in the two bottom corners one quarter of the way. Fold both of the corners over one another so they meet in the middle. Fold the top point down and flip the napkin over, and you have a chic envelop shape. You can leave it as is, or insert your silverware, a pretty flower, or chopsticks if you're serving an Asian menu.
Did these tips make it simple for you? Let me know if you have any questions. I also have LOTS of other napkin folds I will be thrilled to share with you. This was my hobby growing up whenever my mother entertained. It's fun table origami to me.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Table Setting Savvy Part 2
The last post I wrote about "Setting the Mood" before the guest arrived. This post is where all of those glasses, plates, and cutlery items are placed to make a pretty table.
Traditionally, cutlery is laid smallest to largest, working toward the plate. Forks go to the left of the plate, spoons and knives to the right. The exception are the dessert fork and spoon, which go above the plate, spoon on top. There is a great debate among my friends as to whether you should put out the full set of cutlery even if you don't need it (i.e., a salad fork if there is no salad). My feeling is, put out whatever you think a guest might use (who knows, she might want to cut her rigatoni with a knife). But skip anything that will lead a guest to think a course is coming that isn't. (I once left a dinner party extremely hungry, thinking, given the plethora of forks, that the entree was the appetizer.)
Place the water goblet right above the tip of the knife, and set the wineglasses slightly in front of the water. For more formal parties, preset for as many different types of wines or champagne as you plan to serve.
Next Blog post will be the ins and outs of napkins.
Rebecca Mannerly tip: Remember that all food and drinks should be served on each diner's right (that's why the glasses are all on the right), and cleared from each diner's left.
Setting the Mood
I've found that if my guests walk into a nicely set room, it puts them in a good mood and makes them feel pampered - before they've even had a bite.
Table-Setting Savvy
When you're throwing a dinner party, think of your table as the gift-wrapping and your food as the gift. You want to give your guests a knockout visual presentation so they get excited about tucking into the delicious spread you've prepared. But all you really need to pull off the effects is a runner for a semiformal dinner (you and your guests are wearing jeans and a cute top) or a fabric tablecloth for a formal one (everyone's asked to wear cocktail attire).
If you don't have a runner (which is basically just a long strip of fabric laid down the center of your table), a quick makeshift idea is to use a long scarf. I've even used a black brocade scarf of my grandmother's before. Another option is to run a row of fabric place mats down your table. With your flowers and olive oils and other small dishes on top of them, no one will notice they're not all one piece.
For a formal table, splurge on a tablecloth. White is always a safe bet because it won't clash with your plates or food. But don't worry about getting the finest quality. What's more important is that it's ironed and crisp-looking. If you'd sooner have your teeth drilled than iron, send out your napkins and tablecloth to be pressed.
A truly formal setting implies having all of your cutlery, dishes and glassware already on the table at the beginning of the meal. What I like about this - whether I'm actually serving a formal meal or not - is that not only does it pass the Miss Manners test, but as the hostess you don't find yourself scrambling for more glasses during the meal.
More on the placement of each cutlery, dishes and glasses in next blog.
Rebecca Mannerly tip: Forget which side to put the bread plate and which side to put your drinking glasses? Make an "okay" sign with both hands - you'll see that your left hand makes a "b" for bread, and your right hand makes a "d" for drink. Easy!
Table-Setting Savvy
When you're throwing a dinner party, think of your table as the gift-wrapping and your food as the gift. You want to give your guests a knockout visual presentation so they get excited about tucking into the delicious spread you've prepared. But all you really need to pull off the effects is a runner for a semiformal dinner (you and your guests are wearing jeans and a cute top) or a fabric tablecloth for a formal one (everyone's asked to wear cocktail attire).
If you don't have a runner (which is basically just a long strip of fabric laid down the center of your table), a quick makeshift idea is to use a long scarf. I've even used a black brocade scarf of my grandmother's before. Another option is to run a row of fabric place mats down your table. With your flowers and olive oils and other small dishes on top of them, no one will notice they're not all one piece.
For a formal table, splurge on a tablecloth. White is always a safe bet because it won't clash with your plates or food. But don't worry about getting the finest quality. What's more important is that it's ironed and crisp-looking. If you'd sooner have your teeth drilled than iron, send out your napkins and tablecloth to be pressed.
A truly formal setting implies having all of your cutlery, dishes and glassware already on the table at the beginning of the meal. What I like about this - whether I'm actually serving a formal meal or not - is that not only does it pass the Miss Manners test, but as the hostess you don't find yourself scrambling for more glasses during the meal.
More on the placement of each cutlery, dishes and glasses in next blog.
Rebecca Mannerly tip: Forget which side to put the bread plate and which side to put your drinking glasses? Make an "okay" sign with both hands - you'll see that your left hand makes a "b" for bread, and your right hand makes a "d" for drink. Easy!
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Hospitality Begins At Home
Use hospitality one to another without grudging. 1 Peter 4:9
Why is it always easier to extend the courtesies of hospitality to those outside our immediate families? Husbands, relatives, children, or strangely enough their friends often receive short end of our kind attention. This point was brought forcibly home to my friend and me by her daughter, who cleverly exclaimed before a roomful of guests, "Mommy, why aren't you this nice to us when people aren't here?"
Hospitality, like charity, in order to be true, has to begin at home. When we are humiliated enough through comments of our children that we have been forced to examine our attitudes toward them. Did it count, all this gracious open-house business, if we act like a hellion the hour before company arrives? Wasn't there something hypocritical about receiving laurels for our charity work if our own children's friends are neglected? Isn't there a glaring inconsistency if we really treat our children differently when outsiders are around? Through the years I have come to an understanding of the use of hospitality as a gift. But am I really giving to my own?
A woman can't be perfect in everything, can she? Yet telltale marks had been imprinted on my own heart by the timely reading of the Scriptures: If you give even a cup of cold water to a little child...anyone who takes care of a little child is caring for God who sent Me.
Why is it always easier to extend the courtesies of hospitality to those outside our immediate families? Husbands, relatives, children, or strangely enough their friends often receive short end of our kind attention. This point was brought forcibly home to my friend and me by her daughter, who cleverly exclaimed before a roomful of guests, "Mommy, why aren't you this nice to us when people aren't here?"
Hospitality, like charity, in order to be true, has to begin at home. When we are humiliated enough through comments of our children that we have been forced to examine our attitudes toward them. Did it count, all this gracious open-house business, if we act like a hellion the hour before company arrives? Wasn't there something hypocritical about receiving laurels for our charity work if our own children's friends are neglected? Isn't there a glaring inconsistency if we really treat our children differently when outsiders are around? Through the years I have come to an understanding of the use of hospitality as a gift. But am I really giving to my own?
A woman can't be perfect in everything, can she? Yet telltale marks had been imprinted on my own heart by the timely reading of the Scriptures: If you give even a cup of cold water to a little child...anyone who takes care of a little child is caring for God who sent Me.
Family, What's That?
The very existence and presence of my children make home a pleasure for me. When I've come home tired, only to open the door and hear their feet running toward me and feel their warm arms encircle my legs, I've thanked God for their life. They loved me without noticing when my outfit needs accessories, my hair needs attention, or I had a run in my stocking. They never noticed when my face was badly in need of some fresh make-up; they just loved me the way I was.
The pleasure of belonging to a family is a treasure indeed. Each person needs a place where he or she belongs. That is a natural need for every human being. You and I gravitate to a place that we can call our own, a place where we can hang our hat, where we can live in privacy. Where I can be me! We naturally are pulled toward a person or group of persons whom we can trust and where we are accepted as we really are. This, then, is the joy of belonging to a family: We can relax in a private place, whether it is a tent or a tower, a condominium, a cottage, or a castle, with people who love us as we are.
The pleasure of belonging to a family is a treasure indeed. Each person needs a place where he or she belongs. That is a natural need for every human being. You and I gravitate to a place that we can call our own, a place where we can hang our hat, where we can live in privacy. Where I can be me! We naturally are pulled toward a person or group of persons whom we can trust and where we are accepted as we really are. This, then, is the joy of belonging to a family: We can relax in a private place, whether it is a tent or a tower, a condominium, a cottage, or a castle, with people who love us as we are.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
The Party Wardrobe
There was a time when "we're not dressing" meant "black tie instead of white". Now if you clue your guests this way, they're as likely to turn up in undress-blue-jeans as in dinner-jackets. More likely they will call confused and wonder what kind of party you are hosting.
As a host, you have no problem of deciding what to wear. You issued the invitations - and if the clothes were to be different than the usual clothes for your community for that time of the day and year, you said so.
In a word, wear what your guest expect you to wear. Don't embarrass them by outdressing them; they may feel that they haven't given your party the importance you expected it to have. But don't under-dress, or you imply a lack of effort for a party they took quite seriously.
You know your community - and the clothing for Friday night chez vous are quite different in New York City than they are, say, in Southern California. (Who said, "Thank goodness!")
And you know your friends. If a particular, successful manufacturer hates and resents white shirts and ties in off-business hours, tell his wife when you invite him to anything but your Opera Ball, "Have Bo wear a sports shirt, of course," and follow the cue yourself. On the other hand, you work a hardship when you suggest a sports jacket to an Eastern-bred city-ite who feels it disrespectful to his hostess (albeit a suburban one) to appear for dinner in less than a dark suit and white shirt.
The best way to out-guess both sides of this problem is the way these gentlemen dress when they entertain at home. And the obvious moral, if you want both to be comfortable, is - never invite them to the same dinner-party.
As a host, you have no problem of deciding what to wear. You issued the invitations - and if the clothes were to be different than the usual clothes for your community for that time of the day and year, you said so.
In a word, wear what your guest expect you to wear. Don't embarrass them by outdressing them; they may feel that they haven't given your party the importance you expected it to have. But don't under-dress, or you imply a lack of effort for a party they took quite seriously.
You know your community - and the clothing for Friday night chez vous are quite different in New York City than they are, say, in Southern California. (Who said, "Thank goodness!")
And you know your friends. If a particular, successful manufacturer hates and resents white shirts and ties in off-business hours, tell his wife when you invite him to anything but your Opera Ball, "Have Bo wear a sports shirt, of course," and follow the cue yourself. On the other hand, you work a hardship when you suggest a sports jacket to an Eastern-bred city-ite who feels it disrespectful to his hostess (albeit a suburban one) to appear for dinner in less than a dark suit and white shirt.
The best way to out-guess both sides of this problem is the way these gentlemen dress when they entertain at home. And the obvious moral, if you want both to be comfortable, is - never invite them to the same dinner-party.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)